Neuroshambles

Screen Time: Part 2 - The Downsides For Neurodivergent Kids | Hannah Woods

This week we're back with part two of a candid, deep dive into screen time. Last time we covered all the good stuff - the regulation, the social connection, the sense of mastery. This time, we're braving the darker side of the coin.
Mark is joined again by Hannah, mum to nine-year-old Henry (autistic, ADHD, PDA profile) and six-year-old Thea (suspected neurotypical). Together they work through the thornier aspects of neurodivergent parenting and screen time - addiction, in-game spending, safeguarding and parental controls. They also take an honest look at crushing guilt and the shame that often lies underneath it, as well as how to handle transitions off screens without descending into full-scale conflict.
For anyone trying to navigate neurodivergency parenting without a rulebook, this episode won't give you all the answers, but it will make you feel considerably less alone.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (ESTIMATED)
00:01:10 - Meet the Guest
00:02:34 - This Week's Topic: Screen Time - The Difficult Bits
00:03:48 - Screen Addiction, ADHD and the Dopamine Loop
00:16:12 - Managing Screen Time: Swapping One Dopamine Hit for Another
00:21:57 - In-Game Spending, Roblox and Robux
00:29:16 - Safeguarding and Online Safety
00:34:10 - Parental Controls: A Full-Time Job
00:46:52 - Are Screens Putting Our Kids Off Other Kinds of Play?
00:50:39 - Using Screens as a Tool for Transitions and Outings
00:56:38 - Getting Them Off Screens: Transition Strategies That (Sometimes) Work
01:01:45 - Parental Guilt, Shame and Societal Judgement
01:12:46 - It's Not All Rubbish
01:15:12 - Neurodiversity Champions
01:21:43 - Tiny Epic Wins
01:25:48 - What the Flip Moments
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE
Neuroshambles Live, Brighton (23rd July 2026) - www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/1988682312330/?discount=Neuroshamblers
Alternatively, search "Neuroshambles Live" on https://www.eventbrite.co.uk and use the access code “Neuroshamblers” for the discounted rate of £8 throughout May. After that, tickets go on general sale for £10.
Screen time: Part 1 episode - https://neuroshambles.com/episode/screen-time-part-1-the-benefits-for-neurodivergent-kids-hannah-woods
ADHD and dopamine - https://www.additudemag.com/brain-stimulation-and-adhd-cravings-dependency-and-regulation/
Roblox - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roblox
Grow a garden - https://growa-garden.io/
Apple parental controls - https://support.apple.com/en-gb/105121
Google parental controls - https://support.google.com/accounts/answer/15077835?hl=en
Microsoft parental controls - https://www.microsoft.com/en-gb/microsoft-365/family-safety
Crunchyroll - https://www.crunchyroll.com/
Tech Smart Parenting book by Catherine Knibbs - https://amzn.eu/d/0iqIy0cv
Holidays Episode of Neuroshambles - https://neuroshambles.com/episode/holidays-dr-hildi-mitchell
Cards against humanity - https://amzn.eu/d/08Dn7YIt
Smartphone Free Childhood - https://www.smartphonefreechildhood.org/
Spectrum Squad Penarth - https://www.facebook.com/groups/2039735040102766/
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📣 CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
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🎙️ CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

Screen Time: Part 1 - The Benefits For Neurodivergent Kids | Hannah Woods

Description
If you're a parent of a neurodivergent child and you've ever felt quietly judged for your approach to screen time, this episode of Neuroshambles is for you. Mark is joined by Hannah Woods - one of the founders of the Spectrum Squad, a neurodivergent youth group in Penarth, South Wales - to tackle one of the most requested topics the show has ever had: managing screen time with our neurodivergent kids.
This is part one of a two-part deep dive of a particularly knotty topic, and it's entirely focused on the positives of screen time. Because if you're navigating autism parenting, ADHD parenting, or PDA parenting, you'll know that screens aren't just a lazy shortcut - they can be a genuine lifeline. Whether it's helping your child regulate, learn and connect with peers, or just giving you ten minutes of respite to gather your energy, screen time is doing some heavy lifting in a lot of neurodivergent households.
This is an honest, relatable conversation about the gap between the parents we thought we'd be and the parents our kids actually need us to be. Part 2, covering the potential downsides of screen time, is coming in the next episode. But for now, let's hear the case for the defence.
 
Chapter Timestamps
00:00 - Introduction and Neuroshambles Live Announcement
02:56 - Meet the Guest: Hannah Woods
08:10 - Topic Introduction: Screen Time with Neurodivergent Kids
10:00 - How We Thought We'd Parent Around Screens (Before We Met Our Kids)
14:29 - The Stigma Around Screen Time
15:23 - Screen Time Limits, NHS Guidance and Why It Doesn't Apply to Our Kids
18:17 - Dr Naomi Fisher: It's Not the Screen, It's What's Behind It
21:59 - Screens for Regulation - Meltdowns, Overwhelm and India's Wardrobe Nook
29:29 - Special Interests, Hyperfocus and Letting Them Go Deep
39:17 - Online Connection, Belonging and the Social Value of Multiplayer Gaming
42:39 - Building Friendships Through Minecraft and Shared Play
50:04 - Sharing Content as a Love Language (YouTube Clips Count)
55:16 - Watching Online as a Gateway to Special Interests
57:40 - Screens as a Learning Tool - Laptops, Writing and Demand Avoidance
01:01:08 - Reading Apps and How They Changed Everything
01:03:20 - Self-Esteem, Gaming and Finding Your Thing
01:04:53 - Screens as a Social Bridge
01:07:44 - From 3D Printing to School Fair Entrepreneur
01:09:52 - The Parental Sanity Argument (Yes, It Counts)
01:13:16 - Screens for Sleep and Winding Down
01:15:20 - Neurodiversity Champions
01:18:22 - Tiny Epic Wins
01:22:09 - What the Flip Moments
 
Links to Stuff We Mention in This Episode
Neuroshambles Live, Brighton (23rd July 2026) - www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/1988682312330/?discount=Neuroshamblers
Alternatively, search "Neuroshambles Live" on https://www.eventbrite.co.uk and use the access code “Neuroshamblers” for the discounted rate of £8 throughout May. After that, tickets go on general sale for £10.
The Family Experience of PDA by Eliza Fricker - https://amzn.eu/d/02qGPcjD
Dr Naomi Fisher article on screens - https://naomifisher.co.uk/tags/screens/
Bluey - https://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episodes/m000vbrk/bluey
Gravity Falls - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gravity_Falls
How To Break Up With Your Phone - https://amzn.eu/d/04PSfLq9
Roblox - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Roblox
JusTalk Kids - https://kids.justalk.com/
MindJam - https://mindjam.org.uk/
Super Mario Odyssey - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Super_Mario_Odyssey
Audible storybooks - https://www.audible.co.uk/
Calm app - https://www.calm.com/
Greeking Out (National Geographic podcast) - https://www.nationalgeographic.com/podcasts/greeking-out/
Have Fun, Get Fit (South Wales) - https://www.facebook.com/HaveFunGetFitRossParsons/
Neurospicy Wings (South Wales) - https://www.neurospicywings.co.uk/
 
📣 CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/neuroshambles/
🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Neuroshambles
 
🎙️ CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: https://pixabay.com

How to be your neurodivergent child's safe person | Jo and Dotty Matthews

If you've ever found yourself having to outline the entire day's schedule before you've even had your first coffee, or negotiating bath time as a sacred non-negotiable human right, this episode might just be the one you didn't know you needed. Mark is joined by the brilliant Jo Matthews for a deep dive into what it really means to be your child's safe person.
Whether your neuroshambolic family is shaped by autism, ADHD or PDA, so many of us know the exhausting, relentless, sometimes claustrophobic experience of being the one person our child needs above all others. It's a privilege and it's hard work, but it's almost never talked about with the honesty it deserves on a neurodivergent parenting podcast.
In a Neuroshambles first, this episode also features a second guest - Dotty Matthews, Jo's 19-year-old autistic daughter - who joins Mark for a candid, funny and genuinely moving conversation about what it felt like to be that child. From the early days of demanding apple juice to command her mum's attention, through to slowly learning to find safety in other people, Dotty's perspective is the kind of lived experience that makes this show worth your time.
There's also a listener email from Lydia, whose 13-year-old daughter's intense attachment prompted this whole conversation - and both Jo and Dotty have something genuinely useful to say in response. Autistic parenting advice doesn't get much more grounded in lived experience than this.
CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (ESTIMATED)
00:01:08 - Meet the Guest: Jo Matthews
00:03:40 - This Week's Topic: Being Your Child's Safe Person
00:04:22 - Lydia's Listener Email
00:07:06 - Dotty's Early Attachment (and the Gee Story)
00:10:25 - Transitional Objects and Starting School
00:18:58 - Co-regulation: Being Your Child's Emotional Anchor
00:25:54 - Scaffolding the Day: Structure and Predictability
00:30:54 - Being Their Executive Function
00:37:45 - Advocating for Your Child
00:43:41 - Being a Physical Safe Space (Including Co-sleeping)
00:48:05 - Being an Emotional Outlet
00:56:34 - The Guilt and Exhaustion of Being a Safe Person
01:03:12 - Attachment Theory and Building Independence
01:06:58 - When Only One Parent is the Safe Person
01:14:17 - Meet the Second Guest: Dotty Matthews
01:38:51 - It's Not All Rubbish
01:41:07 - Neurodiversity Champions
01:43:46 - Tiny Epic Wins
01:47:04 - What the Flip Moments
LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE
Attachment Theory (John Bowlby) - https://www.simplypsychology.org/bowlby.html
The Loxdale Centre, Portslade - https://www.loxdale.com/
mASCot - https://www.asc-mascot.com/
Mark's talk: "How Dads Can Show Up Better For Our Neurodivergent Kids" - https://neuroshambles.com/page-gazc-3dk8-ywa8-dnly
Raising SEND kids: The Dad's Perspective (with Terry Lloyd) - https://neuroshambles.com/episode/raising-send-kids-the-dads-perspective-terry-lloyd
 
📣 CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
🎙️ CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

Where is the user manual for our neurodivergent kids? | George Lewis

If you've ever stared at a parenting book and thought "none of this applies to my child whatsoever" - this episode is for you. Mark is joined by comedian, author, and fellow parent-in-the-trenches George Lewis for a proper deep dive into one of the great unspoken challenges of neurodivergent parenting: figuring out who your kid actually is, and how to parent them, when the instruction manual simply doesn't exist.
Because most parenting advice out there is written for neurotypical kids. And when you've got autistic, ADHD, or PDA children, you quickly discover that you essentially have to work it out yourself. That means years of research, trial and error, conflicting information, and the occasional moment of going "hang on… is THIS a thing I need to learn about now?" It's exhausting and exasperating, but it's also, occasionally, brilliant.
This is an honest, funny and insightful autism parenting podcast episode that covers the whole messy journey - from those early days of thinking something's different but not knowing quite what, through diagnosis (including the woefully misguided NHS leaflet with their list of top tips), to the point where you cautiously start to feel like you might actually know what you're doing.
If you're deep in that process right now, or just starting out, this one's for you. And if you're a seasoned neurodivergent parenting veteran, you'll recognise pretty much every single moment of it.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated)
00:00 – Intro
01:15 - Meet the Guest: George Lewis
06:28 - Topic of the Week: Writing Your Own User Manual
08:18 - Imagining parenthood vs the reality
12:04 - Apraxia of speech and George's early diagnosis journey
18:19 - Understanding autism: the spectrum, spiky profiles and the mixing desk analogy
31:32 - Navigating the NHS diagnosis route (and the unhelpful booklet you receive when they're diagnosed)
58:16 - Information overload and knowing when to put the lid back on
01:03:39 - Discovering PDA and low demand language
01:05:31 - Conflicting advice and how to navigate it
01:11:36 - Trusting your gut when some recommended approaches don't sit right
01:20:44 - It's Not All Rubbish: the positives of doing the research
01:25:52 - Neurodiversity Champions
01:28:53 - Tiny Epic Wins
01:32:24 - What the Flip! Moments
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE
George Lewis website - https://www.georgelewiscomedian.com
George Lewis Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/georgelewiscom
George Lewis TikTok - https://www.tiktok.com/@georgelewiscomedian
George Lewis Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/georgelewiscom
George Lewis YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@georgelewiscom
Autism Colour Wheel - https://community.autism.org.uk/cfs-file/__key/communityserver-discussions-components-files/4/autism-colour-wheel.pdf
Government SEND white paper - https://www.gov.uk/government/publications/every-child-achieving-and-thriving
Neuroshambles Episode with Kieran Rose: How Autistic Is Your Child? – https://neuroshambles.com/episode/how-autistic-is-your-child-kieran-rose
Autistica - https://www.autistica.org.uk/
Pierre Novellie “Why can’t I just enjoy things?” - https://amzn.eu/d/0fL1X5Fb
Fern Brady “Strong Female Character” - https://amzn.eu/d/07Uk4H6a
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📣 CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: @neuroshambles
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🎙️ CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

Finding your people when you have neurodivergent kids | Sam Bayley

Mark is joined by Sam Bayley - founder of mASCot, a Sussex-based parent-to-parent support network for families of autistic, ADHD and PDA children and young adults - for a warm and genuinely uplifting conversation about one of the most important things you can do as a neurodivergent parent: find your people.
They dig into why parenting a neurodivergent child can feel so isolating - especially in the early days before diagnosis, when you're still trying to crowbar your kid into situations built for neurotypical families and slowly realising it isn't working. Sam shares the story of how mASCot grew from a few breakout coffee sessions into a community supporting thousands of families, and Mark recounts the moment he first walked into Sunday Club and felt the blessed relief of a room with absolutely no judgement in it.
They also get into the thornier side of finding your people - namely, the bit where you have to let go of the ones who aren't. From unsupportive friends who just aren't listening, to family members who think it's all a fad, this episode doesn't shy away from how hard it can be to protect your energy when you haven't got much of it to spare.
If you're after a neurodivergent parenting podcast that feels human, honest and occasionally sweary, this one's for you.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):00:00 - Intro01:11 - Meet the Guest: Sam Bayley04:01 - Topic of the Week: The Importance of Finding Your People09:10 - How mASCot Was Born: Coffee Mornings and the Birth of Community10:09 - Early Expectations and the Reality of Neurodivergent Parenthood27:19 - The "Coming Home to Autism" Event That Changed Everything31:35 - The mASCot Card: A Little Bit of Context, a Lot of Confidence37:51 - Sunday Club and the Joy of a Non-Judgmental Space47:59 - Inspired to Act: Hannah Woods and Spectrum Squad Penarth52:16 - The Online Community: Why mASCot's Facebook Forum Matters59:52 - When Lockdown Showed Us What Our Kids Already Knew01:01:49 - Finding Your People Means Letting Go of the Wrong Ones01:09:05 - The Tricky Business of Unsupportive Family Members01:13:18 - It's Not All Rubbish: The Positives of Finding Your People01:16:17 - Neurodiversity Champions: mASCot, Bill Bayley and the BNC01:22:40 - Tiny Epic Wins01:26:12 - What the Flip? Moments
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
Podcasthon - https://podcasthon.org/
mASCot - https://www.asc-mascot.com
Donate to mASCot via Givey - https://www.givey.com/mascot
National Autistic Society - https://www.autism.org.uk/
PDA Society - https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/
Bristol Parent Carers Forum - https://www.bristolparentcarers.org.uk/
The Explosive Child by Ross W. Greene - https://amzn.eu/d/0jkdMxga
Spectrum Squad Penarth - https://www.facebook.com/groups/2039735040102766/
Brighton Neurodivergent Community (BNC) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/brightonneurodiverse
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📣 CONTACT US🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
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🎙️ CREDITS🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com

The knotty issue of hair care | Rebecca Huseyin

Mark is joined by returning guest Rebecca Hussain for a hilarious chat about the perils of trying to introduce any kind of hair care routine to our neurodivergent kids. It’s a knotty issue for loads of Neuroshambolic families - whether it's brushing, washing, cutting it or trying to navigate dreaded nit combs.
Mark and Rebecca unpick why hair-related stuff can be so dysregulating for our autistic, ADHD or PDA kids - from sensory overwhelm and loss of control, to the irrepressible instinct to run away when someone approaches them with a brush and they're already feeling overwhelmed.
Rebecca explains her role as night time hair brushing ninja and Mark recounts the horror story of the time he tried to trim India's fringe himself. They also dig into the awkward realities of salons and barbers, the compromises that sometimes (briefly) work, and the grim truth that a lot of so-called “simple” solutions don’t feel simple at all when you’re parenting a child with a PDA profile, ADHD traits, or autism-related sensory sensitivities.
If you’re after autistic parenting advice that feels human rather than preachy, this one will have you nodding, laughing and cringing in equal measure.
CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS
00:00:37 - Intro00:01:07 - Meet the guest: Rebecca Huseyin00:05:36 - What’s the topic of the week? Hair care00:08:01 - Haircuts: clippers, salons and pure dread00:13:16 - Dealing with brushing & knots - night time ninja brushing00:21:40 - Sensory overload: why hair care causes so much overwhelm00:25:25 - The drama of washing their hair00:42:34 - Barbers/hairdressers: trusting a stranger with scissors00:47:15 - Products, routines and reducing the stakes00:55:08 - The reason some neurodivergent’s prefer long hair00:58:10 - The lengths we go to for a haircut01:03:12 - Not wanting people to notice their hair01:05:47 - Reliving Mark’s trauma of cutting India’s fringe01:18:17 - A surprising India haircut success story01:21:04 - It’s not all rubbish: looking at the Positives01:22:22 - Neurodiversity Champions01:26:10 - Tiny Epic Wins01:31:18 - What the Flip Moments?
LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE
A Boy Less Ordinary (Rebecca’s blog) - https://aboylessordinary.com/
PDA Society - https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/
Jem’s Hair brush - https://amzn.eu/d/0dTSItLZ
India’s hair brush - https://amzn.eu/d/072vd0L6
India’s coconut scented hair brush - https://amzn.eu/d/05Er65tF
Nit comb - https://amzn.eu/d/00cSPgcz
Grappling with Personal Hygiene episode of Neuroshambles - https://neuroshambles.com/episode/grappling-with-personal-hygiene-rebecca-huseyin
Wash and Go - https://amzn.eu/d/0cmgCDdU
Danielle Jata-Hall / “PDA Parenting” - https://pdaparenting.com/
Hairport (Brighton) - https://www.brightonhairport.co.uk/
EAG Expo, Docklands - https://www.eagexpo.com/
📣 CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
🎙️ CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com
 

Raising SEND kids: the dads’ perspective | Terry Lloyd

Mark Allen is joined by Terry Lloyd for an honest, insightful and humorous chat about what it feels like to parent neurodivergent kids from a dad’s perspective.
They lift the lid on why dads are always “late to the party” when it comes to recognising neurodivergence, struggling to process what it all means, and figuring out how to show up properly for your family - especially when one parent has already been doing the heavy lifting for ages.
They also delve into how traditional gender roles can make everything harder, and why guilt, grief and defensiveness can quietly shape how dads respond in the early days. There are also plenty of practical, lived-experience tales about having to unlearn how we were parented, getting on the same page as your co-parent and the challenge of not accidentally becoming the bad cop.
A must listen for any dads raising autistic, ADHD or PDA kids, as well as any mums interesting in hearing a different perspective of the challenges men face, but often can't articulate.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (ESTIMATED)
00:00:37 – Intro and what’s coming up00:01:15 – Meet the Guest: Terry Lloyd00:04:07 – Topic of the Week: Dads and the neurodivergent parenting journey00:05:36 – Being late to the party spotting neurodivergence (and why dads often miss it)00:06:05 – Inheriting breadwinner v caregiver roles, and the mental load gap00:10:47 – When your co-parent says “something’s different”00:17:03 – Labels, diagnosis, and why denial delays support00:25:21 – The provider/disciplinarian stereotype (and how it backfires)00:32:07 – How our own upbringing can influence dads' approach to parenting00:36:52 – PDA, control, and why authority dynamics don't work00:48:34 – Before diagnosis: doubt, uncertainty, and needing clarity00:51:20 – Grief, shame, and the emotional weight of realising your child is neurodivergent 00:55:40 – The importance of finding other dads in the same boat01:00:07 – Learning the hard way (books and resources that helped)01:09:54 – Advice for dads needing to get more hands-on01:21:08 – It’s Not All Rubbish: Finding the positives01:24:59 – Neurodiversity Champions01:27:57 – Tiny Epic Wins01:29:49 – What the Flip Moments01:34:52 – Outro (how to share your stories, links to the socials and wrap-up)
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE
Neuroshambles website – https://www.neuroshambles.com
The Journey into SEND Fatherhood (book Mark and Terry contributed to) - https://amzn.eu/d/03g3S0J7
The Explosive Child by Ross W. Greene (book) - https://amzn.eu/d/0az7Uy7e
SEND Dads Drop In (Facebook group) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/3100788930061466
PDA Father Figures (Facebook group) - https://www.facebook.com/groups/809973900027348
Lisa Lloyd (@asd_with_a_g_and_t) - https://linktr.ee/ASDwithagandt
Raising the SEN-Betweeners by Lisa Lloyd (book) - https://amzn.eu/d/01pvrF2f
SAA Clothing (sensory-friendly clothing) - https://www.saaclothing.com/
Let Us Learn Too (parent/carer education campaign) - https://letuslearntoo.wordpress.com/
Amaze Sussex dads support group (run by Darren Walker) - https://amazesussex.org.uk/events/dads-group-east-sussex/
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📣 CONTACT NEUROSHAMBLES🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
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🎙️ CREDITS🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com
 

How broken is the healthcare system? | Dr Lucy Pocock

Episode 50 of this neurodivergent parenting podcast takes a clear, practical look at how families in the UK end up navigating the healthcare system when they suspect their child might be autistic and/or ADHD. Mark is joined by Lucy Pocock, a registered GP and parent of a neurodivergent child, as they pull back the curtain and take a deep dive into how the system works (and why it so often doesn’t).
 
They talk through the routes families are typically funnelled into when they’re seeking support: school evidence, GP involvement, referrals, and the confusing reality that the pathway can look completely different depending on where you live. It’s the sort of honest, informative discussion many families of autistic, ADHD and PDA kids wish existed when they first started asking questions.
 
Mark and Lucy also unpack what happens once ADHD enters the mix - including medication pathways, titration, prescribing delays, and the complexities of shared care. Lucy explains why bottlenecks happen, what GPs can and can’t do, and how those constraints land on families already stretched to breaking point.
 
Along the way, the conversation touches on demand-avoidant (PDA) profiles, why some parents go private, and what families can realistically expect when it comes to letters and evidence for things like EHCP and DLA. It’s the kind of candid, good humoured and insightful chat that this neurodivergency parenting podcast is known for.
 
CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (ESTIMATED)
00:00:37 - Episode 50 intro
00:01:20 - Meet the Guest (Lucy Pocock)
00:03:07 - Topic of the Week – UK healthcare and ND referrals (the two main routes)
00:09:23 - The postcode lottery, delays, and mismatched pathways
00:17:42 - ADHD medication: shared care, titration, and why CAMHS take so long
00:27:31 - Lucy's journey with her own PDA son's diagnosis as a GP
00:34:00 - Training: Oliver McGowan and the impact within the NHS
00:37:15 - How much neurodiversity scepticism is there within the healthcare system?
00:42:00 - What can you do if your GP is not informed about neurodiversity?
00:46:15 - Are there really parents trying to take advantage of the system?
00:56:00 - What support can we ask for from our GP that we don't know about?
00:59:45 - Could GP's relieve some of the burden from CAMHS?
01:04:30 - GP limitations on prescribing drugs: melatonin and anti-depressants
01:07:00 - Shared care, Right to Choose and commissioning constraints
01:10:45 - Is the system broken? Why is support for neurodivergency such a postcode lottery?
01:20:30 - How can we fix the flaws in the healthcare system?
01:27:00 - Looking at the positives
01:30:03 - Neurodiversity Champions
01:32:27 - Tiny Epic Wins
01:35:26 - What the Flip Moments
 
LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE
Shared care - https://www.wessexlmcs.com/guidance/understanding-shared-care-nhs-right-to-choose-and-private-providers/
Right to choose - https://adhduk.co.uk/right-to-choose/
CAMHS - https://www.youngminds.org.uk/young-person/your-guide-to-support/guide-to-camhs/
Oliver McGowan training - https://www.hee.nhs.uk/our-work/learning-disability/current-projects/oliver-mcgowan-mandatory-training-learning-disability-autism
FII (Fabricated and Induced Illness) - https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/fabricated-or-induced-illness/overview/
Neuroshambles: Medicating our children | Danielle Jata-Hall - https://neuroshambles.com/episode/medicating-our-children-danielle-jata-hall
Melatonin - https://www.nhs.uk/medicines/melatonin/
Neuroshambles: The Bumpy Road to Diagnosis | Tam - https://neuroshambles.com/episode/the-bumpy-road-to-diagnosis-tam
Murmuration Community, Bristol - https://www.murmurationcommunitytherapy.com/
Incredible Kids, Bristol - https://incrediblekids.org.uk/
 
CONTACT NEUROSHAMBLES
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
 
CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com
 

School: The Primary Years | Grace Lockrobin

If you’ve ever felt like Key Stage 2 at school was when it all got harder - not only for your neurodivergent child, but also for you as a parent - this is the episode for you. Mark is joined by philosophy educator and fellow Neuroshambler Grace Lockrobin for a cathartic look at the ages of 7-11, which is where the wheels can start to wobble more for our autistic, ADHD or PDA kids.
Together, they unpack the pressures of conformity, the nightmare of homework and the heartbreak of parents evenings. From school trips and transitions to SATs and navigating playground politics, they shine a light on why this age can be so tough - and why the system often gets it wrong.
It’s warm, witty, and full of the kind of honesty that makes you feel just a little less alone when your child doesn’t quite fit the mould. 
If you’re searching for an autism parenting podcast or ADHD parenting podcast that actually reflects the messy, hilarious, heartbreaking truth of raising neurodivergent children, you're in the right place.
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CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 - Intro and meet the guest
03:30 - What’s changed since we last spoke
05:50 - Intro to topic of the week
23:00 - The challenges of the shift in KS2 teaching style
10:00 - Misguided attempts to get them to "catch up"
13:00 - The role that transitions play in these difficulties
22:15 - Social cliques and friendship dynamics
35:15 - Bullying
43:00 - The difficulty of parents’ evenings
57:15 - Homework nightmares
1:00:40 - The unhelpful pressure of SATs
1:06:25 - School trips
1:12:10 - It's not all rubbish: looking at the positives
1:24:15 - Neurodiversity Champions
1:27:45 - Tiny Epic Wins
1:30:00 - “What the Flip?” Moments
1:33:50 - Wrap-up and where to find us
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LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
SATs - https://educationhub.blog.gov.uk/2022/05/everything-you-need-to-know-about-sats/
Karate Zone - https://karatezone.com/
PDA Society - https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/
⸻
CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
⸻
CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com
 
 

How autistic is your child? | Kieran Rose

What do we mean when we describe someone as “severely autistic”? Why is it so hard to explain what being autistic actually means? And how useful (or harmful) are terms like high-functioning, low-functioning, profound autism, or even Asperger’s?
Kieran Rose returns for a deep dive into the language we use to describe autism - and why it often does more harm than good. He and Mark explore the flaws in functioning labels, the dangers of ranking autistic traits, and how trying to quantify someone’s autism usually misses the point.
In a wide-ranging and compassionate chat, Mark and Kieran explore how complex, deeply personal and often contradictory this topic is - both for parents and for autistic people themselves. What starts as a provocative question ends up as a fascinating conversation about diagnosis, co-occurring conditions, identity, education, eugenics, power, and prejudice.
A powerful, enlightening and empowering episode - a must-listen for anyone parenting autistic kids who’s ever felt under pressure to explain, justify or minimise their child’s neurodivergence.
 
📍 CHAPTER TIMESTAMPS (Estimated):
00:00 - Intro: Meet Kieran Rose
04:30 - Life in a Fully Neurodivergent Household
08:00 - Topic of the Week: How Autistic Is Your Child?
12:00 - Labels, Bias, and the Stigma Around Autism
18:00 - High vs Low Functioning: Where It Comes From
23:00 - What Even Is Autism?
28:30 - The Flawed Legacy of Asperger’s
35:00 - Identity vs Diagnosis
42:00 - DSM-5 Levels of Autism: Why They Don’t Work
49:00 - Profound Autism and The New York Times Article
55:00 - A Counterpoint: The Voices We Don’t Hear
1:00:00 - Co-occurring Conditions and the Real Source of Needs
1:07:00 - Clinical Labels vs Lived Experience
1:14:00 - Mark’s Imposter Syndrome as an Autism Parent
1:18:00 - What’s the Alternative?
1:23:00 - Final Thoughts: Humanising, Not Diagnosing
1:27:00 - Neurodiversity Champions
1:33:00 - Tiny Epic Wins
1:39:00 - “What the Flip?” Moments
1:43:00 - Wrap-up & Where to Find Us
🔗 LINKS TO STUFF WE MENTION IN THIS EPISODE:
Kieran Rose website - https://theautisticadvocate.com/
Eugenics - https://www.newscientist.com/definition/eugenics/
Asperger Syndrome - https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/what-is-autism/the-history-of-autism/asperger-syndrome
Hans Asperger - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hans_Asperger
Lorna Wing - https://www.autism.org.uk/what-we-do/news/lorna-wing-an-autism-hero
DSM-5 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DSM-5
PDF Download of DSM-5 - https://ia800707.us.archive.org/15/items/info_munsha_DSM5/DSM-5.pdf
New York Times article: The Autism Spectrum Is Too Broad - https://www.nytimes.com/2025/10/16/opinion/autism-diagnosis-category-stigma.html
Greta Thunberg - https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-europe-49918719
What is monotropism? - https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/professional-practice/what-is-monotropism
Ehlers Danlos Syndromes - https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/ehlers-danlos-syndromes/
Communication First - https://communicationfirst.org/
Autism Central - https://www.autismcentral.org.uk/
Kieran Rose Animated Guide to Monotropism - https://youtu.be/qUFDAevkd3E?si=diwlbe4AHRcxfjQF
Kieran Rose Animated Guide to The Double Empathy Problem - https://youtu.be/qpXwYD9bGyU?si=7bnGR2UsrCgLa_hL
 
KIERAN'S HOMEWORK
Kieran Rose Blog: Autism, it’s Labels and the Language of Pathologising Rhetoric - https://theautisticadvocate.com/autism-its-labels-and-the-language-of-pathologising-rhetoric/
Sunday Times article: Extra time in exams ‘unhealthy’ for children with ADHD and autism - https://www.thetimes.com/uk/education/article/extra-time-exams-unhealthy-children-adhd-autism-k820s56zh
TES magazine article: Sami Timimi: Why ‘invented’ SEND labels are disabling pupils - https://www.tes.com/magazine/teaching-learning/general/sami-timimi-interview-problems-with-send-diagnosis-adhd-autism
Yahoo News: Badenoch says motability cars not for people with ADHD - https://uk.news.yahoo.com/badenoch-motability-cars-not-people-135341300.html?guccounter=1
📣 CONTACT US
🌐 Website: www.neuroshambles.com
📧 Email: hello@neuroshambles.com
📸 Instagram: @neuroshambles
🎵 TikTok: @neuroshamblespod
📘 Facebook: Neuroshambles
🧵 Threads: @neuroshambles
🎙️ CREDITS
🎶 Theme music by Skilsel on Pixabay: pixabay.com